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Ephesians Part 3

Last week we continued through chapter 4 and saw how Paul instructed the Ephesians not to live as the unbelieving Gentiles do, and to avoid becoming insensitive to sin so as not to grieve the Holy Spirit. He reminded them they were taught to put off sin and their former way of living. Now, in these first twenty verses of chapter 5, Paul is continuing his instructions to the Christians in Ephesus.


Ephesians 5:1-20

1 Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children 2 and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

3 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. 4 Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. 5 For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a person is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. 6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient. 7 Therefore do not be partners with them.

8 For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light 9 (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) 10 and find out what pleases the Lord. 11 Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. 12 It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. 13 But everything exposed by the light becomes visible—and everything that is illuminated becomes a light. 14 This is why it is said:

“Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”

15 Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. 18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, 19 speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, 20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Paul wants the believers in Ephesus to follow God and walk in the way of love. I think he prefaces this chapter with this reminder because some of his sentences might sound pretty harsh. He starts off reminding them that just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us and sacrificed Himself, so are we to live sacrificially for God.

Then he says, “But among you” Christians, there must not be any immorality. In this NIV translation, Paul says, “not even a hint” of immorality. Here, it seems like the NIV used some liberty in translation. It seems like they used that phrase to stand for the Greek word, “pas” which Strong’s Concordance defines as: all, every, all, the whole, every kind of, and the Greek phrase “mēde onomazesthō” which translated says, “not even let be named.” To paraphrase it, I think Paul is saying Christians should avoid all forms of immorality, impurity or greed so completely that we shouldn’t even talk about it. That seems to match what he says in verse 12 as well, when he says, “It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret.” We should be so averse to immorality that we feel ashamed to even discuss what people are doing. Other translations like the NASB translated it a lot closer to the Greek and simply say, “But sexual immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be mentioned among you, as is proper among saints.”

That’s why there should not “be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.” Does Paul just not have a sense of humor? Is all joking prohibited? No, he’s specifically saying to avoid obscene, foolish, and coarse humor. This would be the kind of humor that’s, unfortunately, found most often in today’s entertainment. Even movies marketed to kids are full of this sort of garbage humor. Why do you think he says that there shouldn’t be this sort of humor? Isn’t it okay to joke about the ridiculous things people do today? First, I think this is support for his directive that immorality must not mentioned among believers. If we are joking about immoral things with fellow believers, then we are making light of sin. Instead of seeing the immorality for what it is, sin that should be avoided, we can become desensitized to it when we laugh about it. I think if tv had existed when Paul was writing this letter, he would have said that we are not to watch shows filled with obscenity and coarse joking. After all, that’s usually how these jokes and ideas live in our head. In our house, we describe this kind of immoral humor as “inappropriate.” We skip most kids’ movies today due to “inappropriate” content. We shouldn’t fill our minds with this way of thinking. Why is this a big deal? Sin starts in our minds. We have to protect our minds from immorality. Paul tells us why in verse 5:5, “For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a person is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.”

Then, in case we don’t believe that statement, he says it again in verse 6: “Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient.”

This verse might seem difficult to understand. We usually think of God’s wrath as being reserved for unbelievers who never repent and so they incur God’s righteous judgement, i.e. His wrath. It seems counter to God’s love and mercy to read about God’s wrath being directed at believers who are disobedient, doesn’t it? But if we properly understand this word, disobedient, that Paul is using here, then I think it makes sense. The Greek word for disobedient, according to Strong’s Concordance, is apeitheia, and it does mean disobedience. But, according to HELPS Word-studies, it’s little more nuanced than simple disobedience. HELPs says, “apeítheia–properly, someone not persuaded, referring to their willful unbelief, i.e. the refusal to be convinced by God’s voice. This is the core-meaning of the entire word-family: 543 (apeítheia), 544 (apeithéō), 545 (apeithḗs). All these cognates focus on man’s decision to reject God’s offers of faith, i.e. refusal to be persuaded in their heart concerning obeying His will (Word).”

This word apeitheia that Paul uses seems to infer that this person is willfully refusing to obey God. The idea is of someone who is not persuaded. That would suggest unbelief, right? Belief is another word for faith. Without faith, it’s impossible to please God (Hebrews 11:6). They are not believing in God’s word, for if they did, they would obey it. Therefore, their willful acts of disobedience displease God and they face God’s wrath.

I wanted to check my line of thinking with someone far more learned than me. Renowned Bible scholar, N.T. Wright doesn’t even go into this being an issue of lack of faith. He takes Paul at face value and says about verses 5 and 6, “What Paul means, then, is that people who behave in these ways not only won’t inherit the final kingdom; they have no place in the present one either” (Paul for Everyone: The Prison Letters, p. 6). He also points out, “’God’s wrath’, in fact, isn’t just a punishment waiting for people at the end of the present age. It isn’t an arbitrary thing whereby God makes up some rules to stop people from enjoying themselves and then threatens to get cross with them if they go ahead anyway. God’s wrath is built into creation itself. There are certain ways of behaving which are so out of line with the way God made the world, and humans in particular, that they bring their own nemesis” (ibid, p. 59).

This is why Paul is making such a big deal about warning the Ephesians. He does not want them to fall into this immoral way of living. It will only lead to their ruin. He warns them not to let anyone deceive them into thinking immorality is no big deal. The warning is for us today. We must be on guard that we are not deceived by all the empty words that society throws around today, telling us that sin is okay. Paul says, don’t let them deceive you, but even more than that, because they will try to deceive you, verse 7 says, “Therefore do not be partners with them.”

Don’t be partners with those who would tell you otherwise. They are just deceiving you. And don’t be partners with those who are living in disobedience to God’s ways. Don’t partake in what they are doing. He says in verses 8 and 9, “For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth).”

This metaphor of darkness and light is used throughout Scripture. 1 John 1:6-7 says, “If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.” If we are children of light, then we will live as children of light. If we walk in darkness and live just like unbelievers do, then we are living a lie. It’s a pretty simple metaphor.

Then Paul says in verse 11, have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness. Don’t partner with people in sin. Have nothing to do with it. He says not only don’t take part in what they are doing, but “rather expose them.” The Greek word, according to Strong’s Concordance, is “elegchó” and it means “to expose, convict, reprove.” Thayer’s Greek Lexicon defines elegcho as, “to convict, refute, confute, generally with a suggestion of the shame of the person convicted.” I thought it was interesting that Thayer used the word shame. I think that gives a pretty clear picture of what Paul is instructing the Ephesians to do. He is telling them if believers are behaving immorally, the other believers must not look the other way and make excuses for them or worse, participate in the immorality with them, but rather point out their error. They must show them where they are wrong in an attempt that shaming them will bring conviction. Again, I think it’s worth mentioning, that Paul had said in the previous chapter, we are to do this from a place of love. Our goal in exposing someone’s inappropriate behavior is not so they get angry and leave the faith. Our motivation should be that the person repents, finds forgiveness from the Lord, and follows Jesus in a way that “pleases the Lord.”

Paul doesn’t explain the specific tactic to take in exposing someone’s sin here in Ephesians, but he does in Galatians 6:1, “Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.” Paul says we are to do this “gently.”

This echoes the very specific instructions Jesus gave on how to do this. In Matthew 18:15-17, Jesus says, “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” I think this is why Paul says to do this gently. We are to start out by talking to the fellow Christian privately. We are to talk to them in person. This assumes that we have a relationship with them of some sort. I suppose if a fellow Christian is a public figure and they are promoting sin, we could privately send them a letter or message, but my guess is we won’t make an impact unless we know that person in real life. Jesus doesn’t speak directly to that situation, so this is simply my opinion, but I think if a person is a “public figure” they have opened themselves up to public scrutiny and in that instance, I think it’s ok to communicate to them publicly. Again, this should be done gently and from a place of love, with the intention being to see them repent and be restored. And until these immoral believers do repent, we should follow Paul’s directive to not partner with them. That means we should have nothing to do with them. If we “follow” them on social media, we should drop them. We shouldn't buy albums or movies if they make them. If we turn a blind eye to fellow Christian’s immorality and continue to support them, it makes us partners with them. Which is what Paul says we should not do. We should not partner with darkness. Instead, we must live in the light.

The key to living in the light is what Paul says in verse 10. Paul tells us to “find out what pleases the Lord.” Before we do anything, what if we always asked the simple question: does this please the Lord?

I’m old enough to remember when WWJD- what would Jesus do?- first became popular. Christian bookstores sold signs and bracelets, people probably wrote books about it. Then those items were ridiculed and relegated to the bargain bin. I wouldn’t want “Does this please the Lord?” to succumb to the same fate, but the sentiments of both are valid. Would things change if we evaluated choices through the lens of “does this please the Lord?” or WWJD? The key is not just considering if something pleases the Lord or not, but actually acting according to that answer. With WWJD, it became a joke in society. People would say it and laugh and then say well, Jesus might not do this, but I’m not Jesus, so, oh well. I think Paul’s directive to find out what pleases the Lord is so much better. Not just because WWJD is not actually in the Bible, but because we can’t excuse ourselves. This directive speaks to God’s judgement. Is He going to be pleased with us or displeased with us? This idea of God being displeased with us should give us pause if we respect Him and honor Him.

That’s part of the problem though, isn’t it? Do we respect God? Do we have a healthy fear of the Lord? While we should rejoice in the fact that as believers we can approach the throne of God with boldness because we are adopted into the family of God through faith in Jesus’ redeeming work on the cross, that doesn’t give us license to willfully displease God. While our actions do not earn our salvation, our actions do prove our faith. While we can never do anything that will make God love us more or less than He does right now, our actions that displease Him could lead to our destruction. I believe that if we willfully continue in sin, Paul says we will incur God’s wrath. I think I’ve quoted this verse many times this year, but it bears repeating. Hebrews 10:26&27 warns, “If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left, but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God.”

Even if someone’s theology disagrees with that and they believe that a person once saved is always saved, a person’s sinful actions will still lead to the destruction of their temporal life. Sin ruins relationships. It hurts us and the people around us. It leads to sickness and early death. Sin causes addictions and pain. The list goes on and on. We are given freedom in Christ, not to sin, but to be freed from sin. As Galatians 5:1 says, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” That yoke of slavery means being a slave to sin. We have been freed from sin through Jesus’ death and resurrection, why would let ourselves become enslaved to sin again? That is why Paul says, “find out what pleases the Lord” and do those things. Act that way. Live in such a way that pleases the Lord. Don’t live in the way of darkness, but live as children of the light.

I can hear the people who will say yes, but we don’t have to worry about any of this. We are saved by grace, and this is not of our own doing. Yes, I agree. We are saved by grace, through faith, and if we are saved, then the Holy Spirit will be working inside of us to cause us to be and do for His good pleasure. He will lead us and prompt us to obey Him. But, if we refuse to obey Him, and walk in the way of darkness and participate in immoral behavior, coarse inappropriate talk, behaving improperly, then we are not walking in the light. And if we keep living like the gentile unbelievers do, then we won’t recognize the sin in our lives and we won’t repent. If we don’t repent, there can be no forgiveness.


But, if we find ourselves in this place of sin, we do have hope. Paul says we are to wake up, rise from the dead place of sin, and Christ will shine on us. If we repent, and turn away from our sin, He will forgive us and shine His light on us, bringing us from the path of darkness leading to death, back to the path of light that leads to eternal life with Him.


Then Paul emphasizes again, in the last paragraph, more specific instructions. He says, “Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery.” He is saying that we must be very careful. We must be deliberate and purposeful in the way we live. We must use wisdom to know what things to avoid. He says to make the most of every opportunity. That means we are not to waste our days or time on foolish things that displease the Lord.


Paul gets specific and says not to get drunk. He is not against wine, but he’s certainly against getting drunk. Anything that clouds our judgement is to be avoided. Instead of filling up on wine, we should “Instead, be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” As a musician, I love these instructions. Both wine and music can gladden our hearts and bring joy. Wine, of course, is easily abused. Instead of drinking, hoping to bring temporary happiness, songs offered to the Lord do far more to bring joy and thanksgiving to our hearts. Also, if our minds are filled with scripture and thoughts about God and how good He is, that will help us keep our minds on Him. If we are keeping Him at the forefront of our minds, we will be less likely to be telling inappropriate jokes or using coarse language. Having our minds focused on Jesus will help us be repulsed by sin and to want to avoid its influence. If we are singing songs to the Lord out loud or in our minds, being led in our thoughts by the Holy Spirit, then those Bible verses and spiritual truths will help us keep on the path of love, as Paul said in the beginning of this chapter.

As Paul said, we must be very careful how we live, for the days are evil. Our society wants to tear our faith down. Now is not the time to become complacent about how we live. Now is the time to proclaim to each other: “Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”

Pray: Heavenly Father, we thank You for the love You have shown us through Jesus Christ, Your son. We pray that You would fill us with Your Holy Spirit so we can be led by You. Please fill our hearts and minds with songs and praise to You. Help us keep our thoughts upon You. Please forgive us when we fail to recognize the things that displease You. Please speak to our hearts and convict us so we can better follow You. In Jesus’ name we pray, amen.

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